We needed to get out of the house.
We needed an adventure.
We needed Target!
We loaded up, and headed out. As soon as we got there Eliza had to go to the bathroom. After a quick stop at the potty we picked a cart. Since Eliza was recovering from her surgery we picked the two seater kind. And of course the seat belts were broken, so Jack was a free agent. Jack should not be a free agent. He ran around the store pulling things off of the shelf right and left. I was trying to hurry so I didn't have to keep Eliza and her pea size bladder out very long. I kept calling, "No Jack! Hurry Jack! Come On Jack! Get In The Cart Jack!"
I was half way down the isle and I turned around to make sure Jack was following, and to my surprise Jack was not following. I looked down one isle, then another, then panic started to set in. I knew he couldn't have gone far, I knew he couldn't have been taken, I knew he wasn't crushed underneath a shelf and yet I didn't know. I started moving a little faster when a lady who could see my panic on my face said, "I think he is over there." And there he was, playing in the make-up.
Now it was time to check out, and run for the car before Eliza had to go potty again. Jack would not stay in the back of the cart while I payed. He kept trying to climb over the side and I kept pulling him back in. After a five minute wrestling match we were home free - outside in the parking lot. All of a sudden Jack bent down and starting throwing groceries out of the cart onto the pavement. I really tried to be patient, I tried to stay calm. I lost it. I looked at Jack and said, "Don't throw my groceries out of the cart." And I gave him a little spank. His first little spank. He looked at me, bent down with his eyes still on mine and picked up the gallon of milk to throw over the edge.
I saved the milk, got to the car and loaded everything and everybody back in. Then Eliza said, "I have to go to the bathroom now!"
So back into Target, back into the bathroom.
I wanted to get out of the house.
I wanted an adventure.
I got it at Target.
7 comments:
Next time I am bored, and need an adventure, I will call you and see if you and Jack want to come to target with me.
That's funny. It sounds like Jack has hit the terrible twos. (not that I would know much about that but I've heard about it). Good luck.
I have complete sympathy for you. Your story made me laugh. Carly is in the runaway at the store phase.
Oh my, you are funny! Just take a little walk over here next time you need a change of scenery! Although we do love the Target! I'm glad you're getting some sleep, that's rough!
Thanks for a good laugh. Not laughing at you, laughing because I soooo remember the days. only now my kids aren't cute 2 year olds that misbehave...it's not as cute when they know better!
What a freekin' nightmare!
Funny! I too had an adventure at Target last night....the jazzy I was riding on lost power at the back of the store with a very full basket. It was my first outing besides work in nearly two weeks! Whew!
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